More often than not we try really hard to be happy when we would just really rather be in a “nothing” mode for the moment, which is “happy” for me the more I think about it. In fact, women find this hard to understand, but we men can just sit and think about “nothing,” which is refreshing since that
does not really require a lot of work or effort on my part. All I need is a remote in one hand with my recliner in that perfect position where there is no neck strain with the opposite arm just hanging out on the other armrest doing “nothing” My mind may drift in and out of consciousness while I am in the “nothing zone,” but I can usually rectify that situation rather quickly by just closing my eyes. Closing my eyes is usually not something that I consciously do, but it is usually the result of thinking about “nothing,” which again, is a nice byproduct of the situation as a whole.
This involuntary eye closing has nothing to do with my narcoleptic tendencies in public places when I sit still for more than five minutes, and for some reason, as much as I love church, it happens. I do not understand it; I am taking notes one second and waking up to a nice quick elbow to my ribcage from my beautiful wife the very next second. She gives me a look like I meant to do it, but I can assure you I didn’t…It is just hard to explain how it happens and I usually do remember the sermon…I have notes to prove it, sort of. The last word written usually looks like a lifeline gone flat though, and I am usually able to get right back on track. This kind of sleep is not one that occurs because of disinterest; it just sneaks up on me and…BOOM!!!
Only a man can understand the “nothing zone.” A woman finds it almost impossible to believe, but it is actually fact. I can sit there in that big ole double recliner and flip the switch to off without actually sleeping. I become somewhat like that voice-activated recorder that starts when someone begins speaking. The only fault with that recorder is that it usually does not record the first word spoken, the one that activated it from “sleep” mode.
This is a problem with the “nothing” mode as well.
I have the best wife in the world, and she does not nag––that is not where I am going, but I tend to miss the first part of what she may have said to deactivate my “nothing” mode and I only catch the last few words of what she was saying. That is the only down side of the “nothing” mode, but she understands that and does not appear upset with me during my frequent visits there.
It is really nice to just kick back and shut just a few of the lights out. With just a few of the lights out, folks will think you are at home if you get my drift, which again, is an entirely different mode than the accidental church nap. I’m sure the church nap would lead to full-on snoring and such if not for my vigilant wife and her precisely placed strikes to the ribs.
With everything that is going on around us nowadays, it is nice to be able to shut off the switch for a minute or two. It is a great thing to be in the “nothing” zone and my only wish is that more ladies could experience it because it is quite refreshing and satisfying, even though I really cannot tell you much about it because I was and do think about “nothing” quite often. Come to think about it, you really can’t explain “nothing” because there really is “nothing” to explain. That would be like herding cats, and what would be the point of that?
I am sure that I will think about nothing again, just not in the fourth quarter or extra innings.
